Memorable Movie Madness - Part I

At the suggestion of my friends, Steve & Steve, I have accepted the challenge of producing a blog of the funniest lines ever said in the movies.  As I began my task, I realized that producing a blog of funny movie lines would not be a challenge.  Limiting it to a single blog would be a nearly impossible.  Therefore, today's blog will be the first of several featuring (mostly) hilarious lines from the movies.  If you have a favorite line that I overlook after this series of blogs, by all means email it to me.

Here is the first installment of memorable movie lines:

Airplane (1980) – Elaine Dickinson (Julie Hagerty)

"There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your
flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?”

Airplane (1980) - Barbara Billingsley (Beaver Cleaver's TV mother) to stewardess who is having a hard time understanding two jive-speaking passengers:

"Stewardess - I speak jive!"


Steel Magnolias (1989) – Truvy (Dolly Parton)
“Time marches on and sooner or later you realize it is marching across your face.”


Animal House (1978) – Dean Wormer (John Vernon)

“Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.”


City Slickers (1991) - Mitch Robbins (Billy Crystal)

“Women need a reason for having sex, men just need a place.”


She Done Him Wrong (1933) – Lady Lou (Mae West)

“When women go wrong, men go right after them.”


Patch Adams (1998) – Patch Adams (Robin Williams)

“If we bury you ass up, I’ve got a place to park my bike”.


My Little Chickadee (1940) – Cuthbert J. Twillie (W.C. Fields)

“During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were
compelled to live on food and water for several days.”


Naked Gun 33 ½ : The Final Insult (1994) – Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen)

“Like a midget at a urinal, I was going to have to stay on my toes.”


Fiddler on the Roof (1971) – Tevye (Topol)

“I know, I know. We are your chosen people. But once in a while can't you choose
someone else?”


Adam's Rib (1949)  - Kip Lurie (David Wayne)

"Lawyers should never marry other lawyers. This is called in-breeding. From this comes idiot children . . . and other lawyers." 


There's Something About Mary (1998) Mary's Step-father (Keith David), after Mary's prom date gets a body part stuck in the zipper of his pants in their bathroom:

"Is is the frank or the beans?" 


The Producers (1968)  Franz Liebkind (Kenneth Mars)

"Not many people know it, but the Führer was a terrific dancer." 


Wayne's World (1992) Wayne Campbell (Mike Myers)

"I once thought I had mono for an entire year. It turned out I was just really bored." 


The Blues Brothers  (1980) Elwood (Dan Aykroyd)

"They're not gonna catch us. We're on a mission from God."


Tootsie (1982)  Michael Dorsey (Dustin Hoffman)
 
I don't believe in hell.  I believe in unemployment, but not hell.


Napoleon Dynamite (2004)  Pedro (Efren Ramirez)

"Vote for me and all your wildest dreams will come true."


The Jerk (1979) Navin R. Johnson (Steve Martin)

"For one dollar I'll guess your weight, your height, or your sex." 


Three Amigos (1986)  Rosita (Benita Marti) to Dusty Bottoms (Chevy Chase)

Rosita: I was thinking later, you could kiss me on the veranda.

Dusty Bottoms: Lips would be fine.